Archive of ‘Technology’ category

Things I Learned After Getting Married During a Pandemic

As 2020 comes to a close, I cannot help but think how COVID-19 has not only altered so many aspects of our lives, but also the way in which we cope with those changes as individuals, families, and communities. One thing I have been reflecting on the most in relation to the pandemic are the weeks leading up to my wedding and how the pandemic helped me find gratitude and strength in all the uncertainty.

Planning a Wedding During a Pandemic

Planning a wedding during an unprecedented time where everyone is constantly trying to process and adapt to new information about this virus was v e r y stressful. And truth be told, I did not expect COVID would still be here by the time my wedding happened in August, but as you know it was more present than ever. As humans I believe that we have this amazing ability to adapt in all types of situations, which is what we ended up doing. Because most of my family and friends were unable to attend, we lived streamed all three days of the festivities and ceremonies. Everyone in attendance wore face coverings. There were hand sanitizing stations and temperature checks at every corner of the venue. Instead of giving away custom Koozies or other trinkets, we sent our guests home with mini monogrammed hand sanitizers. In short, my wedding was nothing like I imagined it would be and by accepting that I allowed myself to be fully present and happy on my special day. 


After reflecting on my own experience, there are a couple of final thoughts that come up for me that I believe may help others cope with the changes that COVID-19 has brought us all. 

Social connection

Social connections are important and while we may not be able to create them as easily during this pandemic, we can still continue to strive for it. Connecting with others may have changed from grabbing an impromptu coffee to having a scheduled Zoom date, but nonetheless when we make time to meet with others it makes us feel better. According to Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Dr. Dana Avey, “having a social network of friends with whom one can spend time is noted to have significant mental health benefits” such as lowering anxiety and depression, regulating emotions, and increasing overall sense of wellbeing. 

Support System

Creating a support system that we can rely on can help us get through this challenging time by having a few people we can turn to for everyday advice, managing stress, or help in a crisis. Support systems will look differently to everyone and that is okay, just as long as the people who make up this system are genuine sources of comfort and guidance.  Research continually shows that people who have a network of supportive relationships live longer, have better health, and are more resilient in times of stress. And when you have people in your corner, they can also help you identify when you’re experiencing stress or even notice it before you do. 

Find Your New Normal

This pandemic is changing how we live, work, and go about our daily lives. After we wrap our mind around how we are all living in an unprecedented time, then only can we work towards trying to find our new normal. It won’t be easy and we may fail, but we can continue trying to live each day with grace and forgiveness for ourselves and others.

Acknowledge Your Feelings

When we try to avoid or ignore important thoughts and feelings, they always have a way of manifesting  either through our behaviors, words, emotions etc. If you realize that certain things keep coming up for you, take a breath and acknowledge them. Being attuned to your own state of being without labeling it as good or bad is a concept that is largely rooted in mindfulness. Being mindful or aware of your body, mind, or feelings does not only have health benefits such as stress reduction, reduced blood pressure, and self regulation, but it can also increase your own awareness and understanding of yourself. Here are some ways you can build your self-awareness. If you’re interested in mindfulness check out this website, which breaks down mindfulness and how to practice it using step by step instructions.

Written by: Geetha Pokala, LPC-Associate Supervised by Kirby Schroeder LPC-S, LMFT-S


How Lifestyle Choices Impact Genes

For a long time, people believed that they could not do anything about their genetic makeup, but the science of epigenetics (genetics) has developed a few exciting theories which may disprove those old beliefs.The Boston University School of Medicine suspects that lifestyle choices directly impact different sequences of deoxyribonucleic acid (DNA). Genetics has three major components: 46 chromosomes arranged in pairs, genes are the parts of the DNA that contain particular proteins that contain information that make cells throughout the body function properly.

The Risks of a Sedentary Lifestyle

You have probably heard people say that sitting all day every day is worse for your health than smoking cigarettes.

Aston University School of Medical Sciences proved that women with high cholesterol were 64 percent more likely to develop breast cancer.

These statistics are potentially connected to the changes developed inside of the genes as the body responds to their body’s high cholesterol and may even alter genes that can be passed down to children and even grandchildren.

Advances in the Applications for Epigenetic Sciences

The Human Genome Project took 13 years to complete with multiple nations collaborating by mapping out the building blocks of our bodies in 2003. 

But the benefits of their research have helped multiple industries, mostly the medical community in massive technological advancements.

Epigenetics is trying to understand the expression and suppression of genes inherited at birth and those that change with lifestyle choices, environments, and situations. The field of epigenetics is exploring the connections between an individual’s habits, family structure, and how these variables impact carcinogenesis and the other processes that activate or turn off the cancer genes. 

Exercise

Humans are meant to be active animals. Our biology evolved by running away from predators and constantly being on alert for them. As human life has created conveniences and we have created a world where the majority of people no longer have to run for their lives from hungry beasts.

Instead, we sit all day in front of computers and then spend the evenings watching Netflix. The negative effects of being a couch potato at night and tied to a desk chair during the day are injuring our genes. 

Physically active individuals are less likely to develop a variety of cancers and other diseases. The very best way to protect your health is to eat well and exercise.

The process of methylation is when there is a change at the molecular level that responds to environmental factors like exposure to chemicals, asbestos, diet, exercise, and how viruses impact and mutate the genes.

Diet and Environmental Factors

Eating well with nutrition in mind versus eating for the way it tastes is a delicate situation to maintain. Many people in the western world struggle with obesity due to cheap fast food and sugar-intense treats that are readily available on almost every street corner.

Living near power plants, exposure to diseases, bacteria, and viruses all play a part in how our genes behave. Not all DNA tests are created with the same care, nor are the laboratories as diligent with evaluating these genetic screenings. That is why it is vital to consult an objective resource that will help you choose the right DNA test for your needs.                             

Written by: Kayleigh Jefferson


Your Child’s Misbehavior May be a Clue That They Need A Routine

I’m writing this blog 6 months into the COVID-19 pandemic, however, I think this topic is helpful during any time of change, transition, and stress.  When things become unpredictable in our lives, adults and children alike experience a desire to have more control and autonomy.  For children, their brains are still rapidly developing, and they lack the years of experience that adults have to weather times of change. Children and teens are being dramatically impacted during this global pandemic, and at Austin Family Counseling (and in our own homes) we are noticing increased worry, anxiety, withdrawal, acting out behavior, and more clues that children need extra support. 

One strategy parents and caregivers can teach is the practice of creating routines. Side note: I’m a BIG FAN of routines, and have actually made a routine out of Back to School Routines (see my  blog from 2014 when my kids were 4 and 2 – now they are 10 and 8! https://austinfamilycounseling.com/back-school-morning-hustle/)

 When students go into a new classroom, there are daily tasks, activities, and rules they engage in under their teacher’s guidance. With practice, these become their new routines at school. Kids as young as age 3 can tell you their school routine – this is when we have outside time, eat lunch, etc.  With preparation and practice, parents can help children develop routines for daily living at home.  

Regardless of whether you are homeschooling, attending school virtually, going back in person, or a hybrid model, with the start of our first pandemic school year here in Texas (and all over the world), consider the following reasons that routines might be just what your child needs. 

Routines provide comfort and structure.

While plans for school, the health of our families, parent job stress, and so many other things around us are spinning, a plan for the day that guides children – “First, I do this. Now, I do this” – allows children to relax and focus on the tasks at hand.  This is a place where they have some control.  Inviting them to co-create their routine with you is so important – use the blank chart below or create one of your own to plan together.  Give choices like “would you like to get dressed before you come down for breakfast or after?” or “What are the 3 things you want to do before you come downstairs in the morning?” or “Would you like to schedule your outside time in the morning or in the afternoon?” 

Routines become the “boss” instead of the parents and caregivers.

When you co-create your routine together, you are making an agreement with your child that this will be how the day goes (consequently, if you dictate their routine or lack of routine, you are making an agreement with your child that you will be on standby to entertain them or keep them busy).  Be sure to build in things they look forward to.  At my house, we have agreed that screen time is from 3pm to 5pm each day.  Because this hasn’t changed it has become predictable, and we can check the clock together so see “how much longer” until they can get on, or my kids can see what they need to get done before being allowed to have their devices. Because we’ve agreed in advance,  I can say “what’s next in your routine?” or “What did we agree we would do from 11-12 today?” pointing to the routine as the “boss” rather than me. 

Routines that are developed by the child give them a sense of autonomy and promote confidence and responsibility. 

 If you start using routines today with your children, how proficient and confident do you think they will be after practicing for 2 years? Or 6 years? Or 8 years? My oldest will likely be moving away to college or to a work study in 8 years – I can’t wait to see how his sense of autonomy and responsibility will have grown! 

Here are some resources for ROUTINES:

Check out this article from the CDC with tips and info about the routines: https://www.cdc.gov/parents/essentials/structure/index.html

Positive Discipline Resources & Video about routines:

https://www.positivediscipline.com/articles/routines-tool-card

“The challenge of parenting lies in finding the balance between nurturing, protecting, and guiding, on one hand, and allowing your child to explore, experiment, and become an independent, unique person, on the other.”

Jane Nelsen (Positive Discipline for Preschoolers: For Their Early Years)

Written By: Lora Ferguson, LPC-S, AFC Founder & Co-Director


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