Getting To Know Your Unconscious

August 25, 2025

There is a quote from Carl Jung that really sticks with me:

“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate.” 

What he is getting at is that so much of what shapes how we feel, and act happens below the surface, stuff we do not even realize is there.  These are the old stories we tell ourselves, the fears we have carried for years, and the memories we have never fully processed.  The unconscious holds feelings, memories, beliefs, and patterns that we might not be aware of but that strongly influence how we think, feel, and behave.

Maybe you have noticed yourself reacting in ways that surprise you, or finding yourself stuck in the same old patterns with relationships or work, even when you want things to be different.  That is often your unconscious running the show without you knowing it.

Getting to know your unconscious means becoming aware of these hidden parts of yourself—the old beliefs, fears, and experiences, sometimes rooted in trauma or difficult moments from childhood or adulthood that you have not fully processed yet.  These parts influence you in ways you do not always understand, and sometimes they keep you feeling trapped or disconnected from what you really want.

Therapy can be the place where you start shining a light on those hidden parts.  It is a space where you get to explore your story with curiosity and without judgment.  When you start seeing these patterns clearly, it is like the fog lifts a bit, and you realize, “Oh, that’s why I keep doing this” or “Now I get where this feeling comes from.”  

My training in Compassionate Inquiry has informed me deeply about how to gently bring these unconscious parts into the light.  This approach creates a safe, curious space to explore the roots of emotional pain and automatic patterns, allowing healing and self-awareness to emerge.

Once you bring those unconscious things into the light, you can start to make different choices.  What felt like “fate” or “just how I am” becomes something you understand, and you can begin to make new choices.

It is not always easy, and it takes time.  But each little bit of awareness, fueled by curiosity, gives you more power over your life.  Instead of feeling like you are on autopilot, you can take the wheel and steer where you want to go.

If you have ever felt stuck, confused, or like life is happening to you, therapy can be the place where you start to take that back.  

Your unconscious does not have to run the show forever.  When you bring it into the light, you reclaim your story, and that is where real change and healing begin.

Written By: Catherine Mok, LCSW

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